One of the largest dining/wining/pub/bar joints in the Top End, if it weren’t hidden behind trees you’d be able to see The Precinct Tavern from the other side of the harbour. Half restaurant, half bar, half pub, half club, this place breaks all the rules of entertainment and mathematics in one go.

Entry into the sliding doors reveals a few options. You can go far left into the restaurant/wine area, hang a short left into the cosy keg lounge, turn right into the pub/bar section where there are 44 varieties of beer on tap, or you can order a drink and go back outside onto one of the tables along the terrace.

Wife and I are here for the restaurant this time – I was invited down by the functions manager for a complimentary meal. Sweet! But fear not readers, I had no intention of giving a good review for a free feed. I gave the Casuarina Club a bashing not long ago and I’m not averse to doing it again seeing as I didn’t get any death threats after that. So let’s find out what The Precinct at the Darwin Waterfront has to offer.

The restaurant is a little bit fancy. There’s a big cocktail bar and wine selection along the back wall and the dining tables are all setup nicely with plenty of room in between. We’re offered sparkling water, which then get’s dunked into a bucket of ice to keep it cool. This I like very much, the only other place I’ve been to that does this is Pee Wee’s at the Point where the price of admission is 4 months pay. There are slices of lemon that come with it too if you’re posh and want to squeeze some into your glass.

The menu I'd describe as modern pub grub with a big lashing of fancy. Lemon cheek, pancetta, yuzu, pecorino, colcannon, figs, parsnips, fire tomato and bush spice are but some of the weird arse terms you'll find on the dinner menu. The word "confit" is used no less than three times as well.

For the first entree we help ourselves to the confit of pork belly with red onion and pale ale jam ($18) which I can only describe as epically epic. It's got a delicately crunchy exterior with a succulent interior. Combine it with the red onion and pale ale jam and you have a foodie ménage à trois in your mouth.

Next up is the native bush spiced calamari with garlic aioli ($15). Lightly battered, it's got just enough crunch with the squid being tender. I liked the little tentacle bits the best actually, super crunchy they were. There's a slice of lemon and lime just in case you can't decide which citrus flavour your prefer. The spices were nice with both a slightly salty and peppery taste at the same time. The aioli wasn't particularly nice though, too oily perhaps. Also a few more pieces of squid on the plate would probably be more fitting of the asking price.

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I had already decided what I wanted for my main before coming. One look at the online menu and I knew the crispy pork knuckle with colcannon potato and beer jus ($28) was destined for my stomach. No need to mention the green beans, they are only there to round off the food groups. The German’s have long been eating this particular cut of porky pig, elsewhere in the world I’m not so sure it has taken root, certainly not in Darwin. Initially my thoughts were that it doesn’t have a very pretty face, but the 360 degrees of crackling on this thing is absolutely out of this world. I kept tapping at it to hear the beautiful sound it made and would break off little pieces at a time to experience the delicate, glass-like cracking of the crackling. Quite different to pork belly crackling, but every bit as good. The meat inside is tender-ish. It’s in the middle of the road in terms of fat content, so it’s neither too dry or too fatty, which makes it a pretty good flavourful cut of meat, working wonderfully well with the beer jus. Those Germans have been holding out on us – pork knuckles are fantastic!

My sexy wife had the chicken breast crumbed with pistachio, sage and parmesan crumbs ($28) - a very fancy sounding schnitzel in other words. I presume the slice of lemon was for the salad. Evidently The Precinct has no shortage of beer or citrus fruits. She is somewhat of an expert in schnitzel seeing as she orders it 75% of the time when eating out, so when she gives it a 10/10 you better believe it. I sneaked a bite and did indeed find it very light and crispy with a moist inside. We skipped dessert - we were just too full. I actually gave up eating the pork knuckle. Twice. It was so good I kept on trying to stuff it down my gob at all costs. I eventually gave up short of the finish line. The night felt like a dream - everything was perfect. So I went back a week later to make sure I wasn't high as a kite from free food.

We're at the keg lounge this time where we are seated on a couch table in front of what can only be described as a massive keg fridge. The beer fridge at work suddenly seems like a novelty toy. The menu is the same on this side of the precinct and you still get lovely young ladies bringing you your food and taking away empty plates, the only difference over here is the scenery and the more casual atmosphere. We get the epically epic confit of pork belly again and it was just as good as the previous week, except the plating was even more beautiful this time around.

I love sweet potato to bits so I ordered the braised lamb shanks with sweet potato and parsnip crisps. I was wondering why the waitress had such huge biceps, clearly it's from carrying plates of this stuff from the kitchen every night. The shanks were super - tender and falling apart. The sweet potato was rocking my world. The sauce absolutely divine. I've never had parsnip before but I'll never have it any other way after this.

I also happened to get a tasting plate of four different beers, the lovely lass behind the bar suggesting a selection of their James Squire range. She was new and had no idea how to work the till, but at least she was friendly and eager to please. If she forgot to charge me that would have pleased me greatly too. I got hammered pretty quickly on the beer, I'll be the first to admit I'm a shaky start when it comes to alcohol. I really liked the golden ales, whilst the apple cider is probably best left to those without a sense of taste.

My wife had the confit of duck with roasted baby beets, marinated figs and apricot ($27). She compared it quite favourably to the $44 double roasted duckling she had at Pee Wee's last week, overall rating it slightly behind, but still very high praise given the caliber and price of said restaurant. I thought it was a bit puny next to my monstrous plate of lamb, which probably made our dinner selections the perfect his and hers combination. Where the confit of duck is a sophisticated arrangement of delicate flavours and cute little girly bits of figs and apricot, the lamb is big, bold and brutish chunky comfort cave man food. Except the cave men never had it this good. Well I can honestly say that both my visits were very pleasing. Service and food both times was fantastic and I can't think of anything to fault.

Apparently it's good business practice to specialise in a particular field, but nobody told The Precinct who have decided to do a bit of everything - and they've done a pretty good job of it. Fantastic food and service in the restaurant, where after dinner the ladies can sip cocktails and talk alien, leaving you and the boys to head over to the bar to watch the footy on the big screen whilst smashing one of the 44 beers on tap. Win win win.